down to the quick

I am alive and in the tidal wave, my friend. You know how it is when you haven't slept for a few nights and in your tiredness you can actually hear the ocean roaring in your ears? I have an essay to write, and I have the worst case of writer's block I can remember in my whole life, so at this moment there must be something I really, really don't want to say. What is it. What is it. When I look into the future what is it that I see that has stopped me in my tracks.